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“How busy are you?”
Have you noticed this is one of the most common conversations that people have?
To answer, “not very busy” is perceived as a negative, like there’s something wrong or not working, rather than a positive that they’ve got their work life balance cracked. “I’m busy enough” is not a phrase that’s often uttered.

Busy means “having a lot to do” and it is held in esteem. We live in a manic society, where busyness is rife, it’s easy to rush around in a frenzy and never be still. As someone who is naturally born a rush-around ‘type A’ fast moving kind of person, I have weaned myself off the busyness drug, and find life more enjoyable now that my pace of life is not so hectic now. Busyness is especially strong in cities such as London, and the pace of life slower and more relaxed in the countryside. In countries such as Africa, the locals sit or lie at the roadside, languishing in non-busyness.

We have become a nation of busy human doings, not relaxed human beings. So why do people get so busy, and what can be done about it?

Why do people get busy?

• Too many tasks for one person for a healthy work life balance
• The buzz created by adrenaline gives a pleasant feeling
• They haven’t spent time creating self-management systems and good prioritisation
• They don’t have clear goals
• They don’t know how/when to delegate
• They think asking for help is a sign of weakness
• To avoid difficult feelings, e.g. fear, sadness, anger, jealousy etc.
• They have certain beliefs running e.g. successful people are busy
• Avoidance of facing up to things that need to be faced up to, e.g. in the wrong job, with a partner not suited to etc.
• Being busy gives a sense of control
• Because their parents kept busy and they feel programmed this way, having mimicked them when growing up
• Feeling guilty or lazy about doing nothing – there are many English expressions that fuel this e.g. a day’s work is never done
• Modern society is super-fast; e mail/MSN etc create an expectation of an immediate response, shops are 24/7 these days, even Bank Holidays aren’t sacrosanct from work or shopping
• We gain a false satisfaction of achieving something when we keep busy, we feel productive, even if it’s false productivity e.g. deleting all the SPAM from your e mail in-box
• Success in defined in monetary terms, not life satisfaction. Size of house, new car, salary etc. and many are always busy striving to achieve it and once they’ve achieved their goal, they get busy focusing on a bigger house, second car etc. It’s never-ending

Why look at reducing busyness?

• Happiness is in small moments observing life/nature which are easy to miss if you are rushing around
• Research into the brain proves that insights to problems are created effortlessly by the unconscious mind when you give it space and time, rather than your conscious mind grappling with them
• Being still, especially when in nature, gives a natural high that is better than the adrenaline high from being busy
• Giving your children uninterrupted time is the best gift you can give them, and it’s free
• You can miss opportunities/synchronicities if you always have your head down being busy
• Few people get to the end of their life wishing they’d been busier, most wish they’d made more time for the simple and enjoyable things, like intimacy, fun, doing hobbies, having lie-ins and relaxing together or alone

Top 10 tips to help with busyness

1. Sit in a chair and do nothing for 10 mins – notice what internal dialogue occurs e.g. “I should be…”, “I can’t just sit here and…”
2. Learn to meditate and have a purpose to your meditation if you feel fidgety
3. Reflect on this question: What does busyness give me that’s positive?
4. Ask yourself, “What’s the cost to me and my close relationships of keeping busy?”
5. Read the book “The power of now” by Eckhart Tolle
6. Plan quiet time in your diary until it becomes a natural habit
7. Keep a diary for a week to increase your awareness of how you spend your time and how satisfied you feel, and use the information to make changes
8. Read Carl Honores book “In praise of slow”
9. Take yourself away from your normal environment with tasks winking for your attention, take a 30mins lunch break in the park; go away for a weekend
10. Find out what your values are with a coach, and redesign your life around what’s important to you, not what’s important to others or society

Here’s some quotes to reflect on:

‘Take time to be quiet’

Zig Ziglar

‘It is only possible to live happily ever after on a day to day basis.’

Margaret Bonnano

‘Life is a succession of moments. To live each one is to succeed’

Corita Kent

‘People spend a lifetime searching for happiness; looking for peace. They chase idle dreams, addictions, religions,
even other people, hoping to fill the emptiness that plagues them. The irony is the only place they ever needed
to search was within’

Ramona L. Anderson

Rachel Brushfield is director at Energise, the Talent Liberation Company and is based in Charlbury, Oxfordshire; tel 0845 22 55 010
She helps people to change work and work better and specialises in career reinvention.

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